Father,

Father, I’m weary. 

I’m an impatient fool.

I’m a shadow chaser.

Mine is running

While I am crawling

Father, please forgive my future

My past is a mess made beautiful 

But my life will continue 

The map I look for guidance is black

I’m waiting

Be the lamp that leads me back

Lead me back

Back to you

Father, speak to me now

I will listen

I will look

Focus on you

You say, “don’t you know you’re my daughter?”

I struggle with acceptance

I live as an orphan

Father, you say, “you are beautiful, my beloved”

But I listen to the noise.

I hold myself against paper

Chained to the air

The vapor 

Standards that crumble 

Father, lift me up

My ears are under

My heart is muted

Lift me up

So I may hear your sweet voice

Where my lungs are resting

And my breathes are steady

Where my heart is beating

And your love is heavy

Father